As usual, I could only write it down.
There’s nothing more embarrassing than missing a guy who dumped you, and you used to hate him. You found yourself scrolling through his page of social media timeline and guessing about the meaning of every conversations. You’re wondering if he actually miss you a tiny bit, after that time, and if the quotes of love he retweeted is about you.
You convinced yourself it isn’t, and then you grow sad.
But it clearly not about you, because he’s speaking about someone who’s already taken, and if you were taken, what are you doing stalking him all night long then grew emo and almost cut yourself? (« this part is exaggeration, I in fact really hate people who cut themselves)
Then you just couldn’t believe if he’s actually…already liking someone else or anything and you, you haven’t even managed to move on a tiny bit from remembering every details of time you spend together.
And that’s very embarrassing. Because I supposed to hate him to the roots, despise everything he said and do or sick on the mention of anything about him but no.
I supposed I should search for a thing to do, NO I ACTUALLY GOT SOME, Plenty of it, but lonely is still a lonely feeling you can’t adjust.
He looked like a very good guy, i just wondered….. when he grew into such jerk? I didn’t see it coming, at all. I’m in confusion if he’s a jerk from the start, or he just so inexperienced in this matter of relationship that he just didn’t realize that in the middle of it he’s becoming a jerk.
Should I talk to him? Should I? But all I want to do is to ask him all the questioning things in my head, start from if he’s missing me or not.
This is not good, and writing it down is a good thing.